Due to me having adhd and corresponding anxiety with a healthy mix of trauma I’m not sure I should speak on this. Sorta biased towards that fear response.
Anyway, almost universally, people with ADHD overreact initially to mistakes they make. This is for a number of reasons, including and not limited to, well…childhood trauma and an education system and culture that severely diminishes their accomplishments while setting inappropriate expectations. Because of all of this (and more besides) people like me feel an exhaustive level of fear when entering new social and professional situations.
The small, inescapable mistakes many people make are magnified in our own heads. So while we often learn quickly, if we’ve learned to cope, we don’t really understand until later. Because of this it can make us feel as if we are incompetent because we display a rapid understanding of complex information and yet have this incessant need to ask questions, even if we could figure out the answer with time and patience.
All because we fear we just don’t understand something in the way we know others expect us to.
Hey though! I’m speaking for a lot of people here. Anybody else with ADHD have a different experience?
This is definitely my experience, even as a fairly social ADHD haver. I think sometimes I come on too strong because I’m trying to figure out and meet people’s expectations, though I think I’m not great at evaluating what exactly those are and heavily overestimate a lot.
Due to me having adhd and corresponding anxiety with a healthy mix of trauma I’m not sure I should speak on this. Sorta biased towards that fear response.
Anyway, almost universally, people with ADHD overreact initially to mistakes they make. This is for a number of reasons, including and not limited to, well…childhood trauma and an education system and culture that severely diminishes their accomplishments while setting inappropriate expectations. Because of all of this (and more besides) people like me feel an exhaustive level of fear when entering new social and professional situations.
The small, inescapable mistakes many people make are magnified in our own heads. So while we often learn quickly, if we’ve learned to cope, we don’t really understand until later. Because of this it can make us feel as if we are incompetent because we display a rapid understanding of complex information and yet have this incessant need to ask questions, even if we could figure out the answer with time and patience.
All because we fear we just don’t understand something in the way we know others expect us to.
Hey though! I’m speaking for a lot of people here. Anybody else with ADHD have a different experience?
This is definitely my experience, even as a fairly social ADHD haver. I think sometimes I come on too strong because I’m trying to figure out and meet people’s expectations, though I think I’m not great at evaluating what exactly those are and heavily overestimate a lot.