Gone in squidxty seconds.

Not even a blue suit.

Might I suggest that it is actually the typical standard condoms available out there that are the problem and not the concept of a condom itself? I have had similar experiences to you, but I decided to try getting a custom fit condom from ONE Condoms. Turns out the standard sizes were just too small and getting an appropriately sized condom improved the experience of using one significantly. I know this is sounding like an ad for ONE Condoms, but maybe it will get some folks to reconsider using protection.

“When I give food to the poor, they call me a saint. When I ask why they are poor, they call me a communist.”

Excellent! I – I mean, too bad.

Earth. Hitler. 1938.

It’s got what the environment craves!

Well, shit.

That ad campaign pissed me off so much. I was even more disappointed when the people here fell for it. I thought we were smarter than those damn companies, but no.

Republicans: there’s never any money to help people, but there’s always money for racism.

Miscommunication and mismatched expectations. Wish I had brought it up earlier.

Thanks, friend.

I fucked up with a woman I really like, so, I did :'(

I… I don’t know why I have these goggles…

Never negotiate with terrorists.

I haven’t seen those old movies in years 👴

Lol, maaan, I posted this story to the upliftingnews community two weeks ago and it got removed for “not being uplifting.” What’s not uplifting about a cute little otter stealing surfboards?

Shark-Hulud.

I read this all in Strong Bad’s voice.