They really should.

Double fatberger with cheese, please.

Black Dreamcast is pretty sexy.

Took the words right out of my mouth.

The Rapture = At literally any moment, your little child self could be snatched violently upward into space/some unknown cosmic destination to the sound of blaring celestial trumpets from the skies, etc. This is 100% real and seems increasingly likely, by the day.

Night-night, sweetie!

There’s also a Meeeeeeemooooomeeeeemoooo or a Neeeeeeee-nrrrrr Neeeeee-nrrrrrr, if you will.

I hope this doesn’t affect my folders full of every Sega game rom ever.

We all know John wins.

Step one to resisting: bullet-time.

Not to be “that guy,” but it really has been happening for quite awhile now (/r/thedonald as one example). And I agree it seems inevitable that it will only get worse.

The handful I’ve encountered up-close-and-personal are legitimately miserable. Nice trips, sure. Nice stuff. But the opposite of “joyful” in a very obvious way.

How about the Kool Kids Klan?

Oh, act your age

Yes, the first, and also known by future historians as the “Darkest Age,” for some reason. I should’ve asked.

Sticks and stones may break my bones…

You’ll pry my balls from my cold, dead hands.

What’s it like, Ron?

Sex for me usually involves closing 50 browser tabs right after.

Normally long trips feel like they take forever, but on this one, the times they were a’changin’.

Unplug for awhile…before we’re all unplugged!!!